This is how the horror story begins: Wisconsin man bags deer with 7 legs.

With the foreshadowing: "And by the way, I did eat it," Lisko said. "It was tasty."

Echo on "...tasty."

Cut to intro credits.

After you get introduced to Lisko's family (helping you to judge whether he's a sympathetic character or about to deserve what happens to him), Lisko starts noticing strange bumps on his appendages. Growths. Down there, too. Then maybe his wife starts to notice her own changes soon after that.

Then you realize Lisko, being a generous soul with more venison than he can eat, has shared out his latest kill, perhaps not even letting people know where that sausage came from.

Hermaphrodite crab people: arise! Propagate! Troublesome reporters? "...tasty." Forget those two-leg limited pants. Time for muu-muus.

And have your sad story retold one-day on the Sci-Fi channel with Dean Cain as the hero.